"I had my baby in a paddling pool!"

When Jane and I met and married our lives started to change. Jane fell pregnant with our daughter but four months into her pregnancy on Christmas Eve she collapsed at home. I was urgently called to the hospital. 'We have X rayed your wife' said the consultant 'and have discovered a large growth.' When I pressed to know if it was cancer the consultant would not answer one way or the other. They would operate tomorrow- Christmas Day. It was likely, they warned, that she would lose the baby.

Perhaps the worst moment for both of us was having to leave Jane alone in hospital. Our children from our previous marriage were looking forward to Father Christmas coming. It was too late to make arrangements with their Grandparents so I returned home to get them to bed, wrap the presents and fill the stockings. Jane was very brave and faced the forthcoming crisis with great courage. Our first Christmas together as a family was not to be.

On Christmas morning the surgeons removed an ovarian cyst from Jane's fallopian tubes. It was one of the biggest they'd ever seen. And it was benign!

"I was worried that there might be complications with my pregnancy" says Jane "I was 38 and some people think that that's too old to have a baby But both Craig and I had been married before and we wanted a child of our own. We decided that the birth should reflect our spiritual values"

When Jane announced that she wanted to have the baby at home by underwater birth I thought that she was joking. In theory it sounded a great idea but after the hospital scare I would have preferred that she had as 'normal' a birth as possible with as much technology around us as a hospital could muster.

But Jane would have none of it. Her mind was made up.

The midwife reassured me that if there were any complications then they would take Jane straight to hospital. Gradually I relented. There were many benefits: it reduces pain of the mother's contractions and eases the trauma of birth for the baby. And many claim that a water birth improves a child's intelligence and makes them more perceptive - even psychic. But most of all it symbolised a spiritual entry into the world. Water is a very powerful conductor of psychic energies and if Jane and I were in the pool together then our auras, and spirits would blend together.

"The birthing pool was a round blue plastic tub of about 6 ft in diameter that came in four sections- it looked like a deep paddling pool." says Jane "Craig, who normally detests DIY, assembled it and we filled it up for a practice run. Celeste (Craig's daughter from his first marriage) and Chantall (my first daughter) were dying to get in to our new swimming pool that had taken over our dining room. Even our dog William barked his frustration at not being able to join in the fun. For the practice run we could be carefree but for the birth itself we were careful to sterilise everything. We were supplied with a special sterile lining to be used on the big day. The midwife was very cautious to ensure that the extensive training she had undertaken at her own expense, to plan for this birth, was put fully into effect.

"For the trial run I put an ugly 'cabbage patch doll' under my T-shirt and when I pushed it out, with realistic groans of birth, it would shoot to the surface like a cork. 'Oh look mummy it looks just like Craig' said Chantall sarcastically. I couldn't wait for the real baby to come along ,everybody was excited even the midwife.

"On the morning of the 22nd June, the day after the Summer Solstice, I started to get contractions. Then they stopped. I started to experience terrible pain and Craig quickly rang the midwife and began filling the pool. When Jan arrived the baby was well on its way and it was touch and go as to whether we could fill the pool at the right temperature of exactly 100 degrees Fahrenheit in time. Our central heating system and immersion heater were having trouble coping. An so was I

"The midwife could feel with her hand that the baby was facing the wrong way and that if it didn't turn, they might have to use forceps. The pain was, for a time, unbearable but as soon as I got into the water the pain in my back just went and the baby's head engaged round the correct way. I wished that I'd got in earlier. Craig shut the blinds, put on some tranquil new age music, put on his bathers and leaped in with me. He held me from behind to give me an anchor to push against. The midwife rang everyone that should be there. And Doctor Hood, our GP, brought along his little boy to watch.

"Then the doorbell rang. It was our daughters Chantall and Celeste back from school. They too came into the room to watch the birth and could help if they wanted. Chantall decided not to have a ring side view watch but watched through the part opened dinning room door. Celeste absolutely loved it. She sponged my forehead and insisted on watching everything. There would never be any rivalry or jealousy towards this baby, I thought, they had helped deliver it!"

I never realised that when a woman is giving birth she has the strength of ten men. I too felt like ten men but nine of them were dead. Every time Jane pushed against the side with her legs she pushed against my chest. (she was sitting in my lap) With each contraction all the air would be forced out of my lungs and together with the weight of the water I felt that I was going to start hyperventilating or something. I laughed to myself and thought "So you wanted to share the experience of the birth now you've got it pain and all". It was also amusing the way Celeste kept coming over and mopping my brow while Jane sweated away unattended. Afterwards Jane looked fine and as if nothing had happened, everyone said that I looked like the one who had given birth!

At 4.26 PM the baby arrived. "I put my hands down into the water and delivered her myself." says Jane proudly "I took hold of the head when I felt it drop. The midwife was pleased to see that the baby was now in the correct position and had fully turned while I was in the water. I gently lifted the baby up through the surface of the water. It was a beautiful moment, as if time stood still. A holy moment. I was ecstatic as I pulled the baby upwards as if in slow motion- it was a girl. The moment she was out of the water she began to cry and I started laughing-she was perfect in every detail. We'd suffered so much and now here was our little baby."

The girls were amazed. We thought that they might have been squeamish but they really loved watching the birth. "Well done" said my mum, arriving only seconds after the birth. She was the first to hold the baby. "This is how a birth should be" says Jane "with your family gathered round you. I climbed out of the tub to deliver the afterbirth in private. (much to the disappointment of Celeste who wanted to see more) I had a few stitches but it was remarkable that I had needed no gas or painkillers throughout. The girls eagerly nursed baby Danielle, and we all had a nice cup of tea. We needed it as it was a very hot day, the tubs water was 100 degrees, it was about 80 outside, and the whole building was as hot and steamy as a sauna.

"There was a wonderful atmosphere in that house that day." says Jane "It was very special. The doctor and midwife looked all flaked out. Already I was thinking how I'd like to do it all over again. A water birth at home is a truly spiritual experience. I didn't feel tired but they made me have a bath and go to bed.

"I lay in bed I looked at baby Danielle snuggled in my arms. Here was this beautiful darling little baby with lots of hair and so perfect in every way. I truly believed that she was a child of God. My Danielle. My water baby. I was so pleased that at last our child had arrived. When I looked into her brilliant blue eyes' says Jane 'I knew that all the suffering was worthwhile.'

But the suffering was by no means over. A few days after Danielle was born we received papers from the courts telling us that both of our ex-partners were filling for custody of the step children. Jane's ex-husband was engaged to an American multi millionaires's so money was no object. Meanwhile my ex-wife was on legal aid. We fought tooth and nail but the financial consequences of the long drawn out court cases were crippling.

I can't go into details but it hurt us all to see the new family broken up. I had struggled for 9 years on my own bringing Celeste up from 16 months old and making tremendous sacrifices to ensure she was all right. Jane had also made similar sacrifices over Justin and Chantall

My advertising agency, which I had toiled to establish over 15 years, began to suffer because of the time I had to spend in court and in preparing to go to court. I missed critical meetings and couldn't follow up sales leads. Instead of writing quotes I wrote affidavits. Turn-over plummeted and costs rose. Then I lost my three most important accounts within a week. The business collapsed.

As I watched the receiver tow away my Jaguar car I clearly heard the voice of my 'dead' Grandmother. 'Don't worry Craig. It's only things. Go forward now and do what you know you've got to do.'

Somehow we kept our house and survived. In the space of a year our world had changed beyond recognition. No more champagne lunches entertaining clients at French restaurants; no more trips for Jane on the QE2, no more luxuries. But deep in our hearts we knew that these things didn't matter. Spiritually we had both already decided to dedicate our lives to the service of Spirit. Now was our chance to prove it in cold reality.

The decks had been cleared and the stage was set for a new beginning. In a few years we'd been through some momentous times. Nothing much more could be taken away from us. The only way was up.